My 5-year-old launched himself into the living room with all the flourish of a superhero and exclaimed at the top of his lungs "I'M THE STRONGEST MAN IN THE WORLD!!" To prove this claim he produced a piece of paper which he held over his head and, grasping an end in each hand, began to pull with all his might. Unfortunately, his demonstration wasn't exactly going as he'd intended. Clad only in his Superman underwear, his skinny little stick-figure frame pulled and grunted with all his might for what seemed like an excruciatingly long time, with intermittent grunts he declared "The...oof...strongest...ERRRRR!..man...MMMMMMFFFF...in....grrrrrrr"
His face was beet red with effort, and I wanted to help him out a bit. "Honey, if you tear that rather than pull..."
"NO Mommy," he grunted determinedly, his little hand thrust out in my direction "I got this. The...aaaAARG...strongest man...rrrrRRRRR...in...the... ooooooooooooof....WORLD!" at which point he finally caught on that tearing really WAS the best way to get the job done, tore the sheet of paper with ease and waved the pieces over his head in victory. Without any acknowledgement of how thoroughly unconvincing this demonstration turned out to be, he launched himself back OUT of the living room, and immersed himself in something less strenuous.
It's amazing how hard it is to do things the wrong way. A simple piece of paper that rips with ease is shockingly strong when pulled end from end, even by an adult.
In Acts 26, Paul is telling King Agrippa about his dramatic conversion on the road to Damascus. Paul, then known as Saul, was zealous to protect his Jewish faith and his intention was to wipe out these "blasphemers" who followed Jesus of Nazareth. The trip to Damascus was to be part of this effort. But as he and his companions traveled along the road, they were overwhelmed by a bright light. Paul continues his story in verse 14:
And when we had all fallen to the ground, I heard a voice saying to me in the Hebrew language, ‘Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting me? It is hard for you to kick against the goads.’
Saul was committed. He was serious. But he was wrong, and Jesus himself confronted him about it. "It is hard for you to kick against the goads." Such a vivid word-picture. "Goads" were the pointy sticks farmers used to guide livestock in a certain direction. The notion of a pointy-stick might seem a bit disagreeable from the animal's point of view, but you could have a pleasant chat with a cow all day long and the likelihood of that translating into directions for his afternoon walk is unlikely. It takes the pointy stick to do that.
Sometimes I have more in common with cows than I care to admit...
Notice what Jesus says here: "It is hard for you..."
I've been IN the will of God and I've been OUT of the will of God (and the latter embarrassingly often). No matter how difficult obedience may seem and how attractive disobedience may appear, in the end things are always so hard outside the will of God.
It's just like Carson trying to pull that paper apart, spending his strength and straining his little muscles on a plan that simply wasn't going to work.
Oh, how often I'm like that with God!
I plow ahead with my scrawny effort and leave God out of it. And my efforts may very well be towards something good and noble and perhaps even "godly" but if God isn't in it, if God's will is for me to go in a different direction, then I can pull and strain and perhaps even succeed for a time, but it will be hard in the end. So much harder than if I'd just listened for His direction in the first place.
That's not to say that obedience is always easy or that disobedience is necessarily difficult. In fact, often God's way seems to be the more difficult path, the more uncomfortable path, and it is so tempting to choose what looks easier, perhaps even more practical. Our decision to choose obedience, to choose God’s way over our way, is often the most difficult part - once you've decided to do that thing, the doing isn't really so difficult after all.
And the opposite is true when you reject the will of God. Initially, it may seem easier to put it off, ignore it, or outright refuse what you feel God is calling you to. Sometimes you may even seem to prosper for a season outside of God's will. But eventually it becomes very difficult indeed.
Seeking - and choosing - God’s will isn’t reserved just for the big decisions of life. Let’s not agonize over whether God is calling us to a mission in Africa and ignore that persistent nudge to knock on the door of our next-door neighbor to invite them to church. Seeking God’s will for where we live and put down family roots is certainly important, but it is just as important to consistently seek His will for HOW we live – how we interact with friends and loved ones, and how we treat those we come in contact with at the grocery store or in that long, ridiculously slow line at the post office.
My prayer is that as believers and followers of Christ, our souls would be softened to His Holy Spirit, that we would hear His voice and sense those nudges of direction, even in the simplicities of our daily lives. That we would be bold in talking to that neighbor, that we would be patient in those moments of frustration, that we would not kick against the goads of his will, but rather commit to seeking it through the pages of His Word and commit to doing it, strengthened by Holy Spirit through the power of prayer.
