“I love you so much, it’s like how much you love me, times a zillion.” My four-year-old son is generous with hugs, kisses and his declarations of affection. Recently he has taken to trying to quantify the depth of his love for his dad and I, and most of our “I love you’s” are met by his attempt to explain how HUGE his love is. “I love you 1 trillion, 5 million, seven-zero-ty-one.” “I love you bigger than anyone in the whole world!” or one of my favorites: “I love you as much as if the whole universe were hugs,” And yet I am quite sure that I love him more.
It is very likely that in ten years or so, there will come a season when my beloved son will not make these heart-warming pronouncements. Oh, that I could bottle them and save them up for his teen years! At some point, he will be probably be embarrassed to be seen in public with his mom and dad. He will slam his bedroom door and wonder why he got saddled with such ridiculous parents. I’m sure it will sting, but I will love him anyway, pray for him and remember fondly what it was like when the whole universe was full of hugs just for me.
Our Heavenly Father knows exactly how that feels.
I was raised in church, and as a little girl I would memorize Bible verses and preach deep theological sermons to the cows that grazed in the pastures behind my rural home (I’m sure I have many bovine converts to my credit and I can only imagine how those many changed cow-lives impacted the cattle in neighboring pastures). As I grew up, the seductions of the world choked out my childhood faith. By the time I was in high school, I didn’t want to be seen in public with God anymore. As a freshman in college, I very intentionally turned my back on Him and slammed the door behind me.
Oh, how that must have grieved God!
But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8
I am so humbled by God’s love for me. By His patience with me. By His persistence in seeking after me after all I did to distance myself from Him. He doesn’t wait for us to clean ourselves up. He doesn’t wait for us to pick ourselves up by the bootstraps and pull ourselves together. While we were still sinners…we are to come as we are. Leave the cleaning up to God.
We cannot ever fully grasp the extent of God’s love for us, but to lay hold of even a corner of the depth and breadth of his affections, I think we must first recognize and acknowledge the immensity and power of God Himself.
We sometimes – even unintentionally - prefer to make God into something of our own creation rather than acknowledge that the opposite is true. We cast him comfortably into the role of a grey-haired elderly sort who used his create-o-matic to churn out lambs and bunny rabbits at the dawn of time and now resides on a cloud where he answers the occasional prayer and enjoys an endless chorus of harp music. To acknowledge the affections of this version of God is, well, expected. Of course he loves us. He’s just like the divine version of everybody’s favorite grandpa.
But that’s not really God.
To even begin comprehend God is to first recognize that he is incomprehensible and that His power and sovereignty is so far beyond anything we could possibly hope to understand, any attempt to turn him into something we can “wrap our brains around” is to actually deny the essence of who He is. He is all-knowing, all-powerful, almighty and absolutely holy. The prophet Isaiah describes his encounter with the Lord:
…I saw the Lord sitting upon a throne, high and lifted up; and the train of his robe filled the temple. Above him stood the seraphim. Each had six wings: with two he covered his face, and with two he covered his feet, and with two he flew. And one called to another and said:
“Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of hosts;
the whole earth is full of his glory!” Isaiah 6:1-3
The heavenly beings who exist in His presence are in a perpetual state of worship because the Lord is so Holy! When Isaiah witnesses this he says:
...“Woe is me! For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!” Isaiah 6:5
When confronted with the majesty and holiness of God, our sin and the wretchedness of our humanity is exposed. If contemplation upon our Heavenly Father does not leave us completely in awe and laid bare, I have to wonder if we are really contemplating God at all.
And yet THIS is the God who loves us. The God who created all that we see and hear and engineered our capacity to do so, the God who placed the stars in the sky and designed our solar system to sustain life, THIS God knows the number of hairs on our heads and loves us. He wants not only a relationship with us, but to identify us as his children. And he was willing to send his son to die for us in order to make that possible.
What love He has for us!
Even an entire universe of hugs cannot match it.
Monday, February 18, 2013
Friday, February 8, 2013
Sacrifice
Sacrifice is one of those words that has always made me a little uncomfortable. As an only child in a self-absorbed culture, the mere suggestion of sacrifice has, at times, left me desperate to rationalize all the reasons why it isn’t really necessary. Converting suggestion to action and actually making a sacrifice – even a seemingly insignificant one - has, sometimes been enough to make me downright resentful.
It’s humiliating, really, to admit how selfish I have been throughout much of my life. Humiliating to think how I’ve struggled to give up foods I love in a quest for better health for the sake of my family. Humiliating to consider the number of times my “good intentions” have gone unrealized because I didn’t want to inconvenience myself and sacrifice my effort or time (especially my time) for the benefit of someone else.
And those are just the little things.
If you grew up in church, the story of Abraham and Isaac’s journey to Moriah is a familiar one. It is the uncomfortable tale of how God makes an unimaginable demand of his faithful follower Abraham: Take your precious son, your beloved long awaited and long prayed for son, and sacrifice him as a burnt offering.
For many years I struggled with this story. In all honesty, I saw it as a disturbing account of a cruel God and a follower who must be nothing short of brainwashed to respond in obedience to such an appalling demand.
But as I’ve grown in my faith and poured through this story with a heart to understand it, I’ve realized that in truth it is the beautiful story of how God takes us through testing and hardship to mature us, to expose areas where we need to grow or change and ultimately to reveal himself to us. Sometimes that testing is about sacrifice.
I found myself in this story once again this week, and as so often happens with Scripture, a new reading brought deeper reflection as I placed myself in Abraham’s robes and considered the walk to Moriah.
What are you willing to sacrifice for God?
That is certainly a question to consider, but I believe the real question, the more painful question, the question that exposes where we need to grow is:
What are you NOT willing to sacrifice?
Where do you draw the line and say “No way. I will NOT give up Survivor / Facebook / Starbucks / Chocolate Frosted Cake Donuts.” “Lord, I’ll follow you, but don’t ask me to give up cable TV / sell my house / trade in my luxury car / take a different job.”
Genesis 22 opens by telling us that God is testing Abraham. Abraham. The man who gave up the comfort of familiar surroundings and the security of family and friends to walk out into the wilderness, to a land yet unknown to him, because God told him to (Genesis 12:1-4). Talk about a test – that was a test, and Abraham walked out in faith. Yet here we are, years later, and God is testing him again, calling him to give up something, again, but this time the sacrifice he is asking for is beyond comprehension. Sacrifice your son. Your only son, the son you love and upon whom all your hopes and dreams for the future rest. And Abraham’s response? He saddled up the donkey and headed to Moriah.
Minds and hearts more qualified than mine have mined this story for spiritual truth, but as I read this story I am struck by those lessons that I can take with me into my daily life:
God will test us – even if He has tested us before. Faith is not like one of those things where you study up, have the big test and if you pass you’re certified. As believers, we’re never DONE. There is always more to learn, more to develop, more to be done to purify us to be more and more like Jesus. I know I’m definitely not there yet, and there are undoubtedly many tests to come.
God will often ask us to relinquish the one thing we most want to hang on to. Abraham loved this child, as any of us with children can understand, but along with that was the fact that Isaac was the key to all of God’s promises to Abraham. In Timothy Keller’s book Counterfeit Gods he says:
If God had not intervened [that is, demanded the sacrifice of Isaac] Abraham would have certainly come to love his son more than anything in the world, if he did not already do so. That would have been idolatry and all idolatry is destructive.
From this perspective we see that God’s extremely rough treatment of Abraham was actually merciful. Isaac was a wonderful gift to Abraham, but he was not safe to have and hold until Abraham was willing to put God first. As long as Abraham never had to choose between his son and obedience to God, he could not see that his love was becoming idolatrous (pp. 13-14).
God is clear that we are to have “no other god’s before me.” Not our children, not our bank account, not our career or our home or computer or food or...anything.
One of the hardest prayers I’ve ever prayed is that the Lord would show me those things in my life that keep me from Him. Actually, the prayer itself was easy, but acknowledging the answer? Not so much. It isn’t the magnitude of the thing as much as my attachment to it. Some of us would rather sell our homes than give up Facebook. Is my relationship with Jesus important enough to me to pray that prayer and then act upon the answer?
When God calls, just go. Abraham didn’t mull over God’s request for a week or two. He didn’t argue with God, or beg him to reconsider. He didn't ignore God and hope that maybe He would forget about it. Abraham got up the next morning and he went. If the Almighty Creator of the universe calls you, for heaven’s sake, GO!
That isn't the end of the story, of course. I chose to split the story into two parts because I think there is value in reflecting on each piece individually. The first piece above involves simply knowing what God has called us to sacrifice. The second piece brings about the business of actually doing it, and that is a very different, and often very difficult thing.
Read: Genesis 22:9-14
When God calls us to sacrifice, he asks US to lay the thing upon the alter. God did not take Isaac from Abraham, he asked Abraham to give him up. Abraham had to build the alter, lay the wood upon it, bind his son, lay him upon the wood and then draw the knife. When God reveals something that must go (and whatever it is that chafes you to think about, that may well be it) it is our job to take the thing, bind it and lay it upon the alter.
You gotta look up if you want to see God's provision. At the moment that the Angel of the Lord called out to Abraham to stop him from harming his son, he looked up and saw that God had provided a ram for sacrifice. God’s intention from the start was always to provide a ram for Abraham, but the Lord had to take Abraham through the process of laying Isaac on the alter and acknowledging that as much as he loved this precious son, he loved God more. Ultimately Abraham knew that God was a holy God who would keep his promises to him and he recognized that his obedience to God’s call was more important than understanding God’s call. God always provides, but our focus must be on Him. If we are so focused on that thing we feel called to give up, we will never see God’s provision in the midst of it.
When God calls us to sacrifice something, it is never really about the thing we’re giving up, it is about an unhealthy relationship with that thing. Sometimes, like with Abraham and Isaac, our willingness to sacrifice it is enough and in the end we don't have to give it up at all. But when our attachment to something interferes with our relationship with God or our capacity to live out that which He has called us to, it needs to go, pure and simple.
Sometimes the sacrifices God calls us to are great, but sometimes the smaller ones are just as difficult to put into practice:
When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars, which you have set in place,
what is man that you are mindful of him,
and the son of man that you care for him Psalm 8:3-4
It’s humiliating, really, to admit how selfish I have been throughout much of my life. Humiliating to think how I’ve struggled to give up foods I love in a quest for better health for the sake of my family. Humiliating to consider the number of times my “good intentions” have gone unrealized because I didn’t want to inconvenience myself and sacrifice my effort or time (especially my time) for the benefit of someone else.
And those are just the little things.
Read: Genesis 22:1-3
If you grew up in church, the story of Abraham and Isaac’s journey to Moriah is a familiar one. It is the uncomfortable tale of how God makes an unimaginable demand of his faithful follower Abraham: Take your precious son, your beloved long awaited and long prayed for son, and sacrifice him as a burnt offering.
For many years I struggled with this story. In all honesty, I saw it as a disturbing account of a cruel God and a follower who must be nothing short of brainwashed to respond in obedience to such an appalling demand.
But as I’ve grown in my faith and poured through this story with a heart to understand it, I’ve realized that in truth it is the beautiful story of how God takes us through testing and hardship to mature us, to expose areas where we need to grow or change and ultimately to reveal himself to us. Sometimes that testing is about sacrifice.
I found myself in this story once again this week, and as so often happens with Scripture, a new reading brought deeper reflection as I placed myself in Abraham’s robes and considered the walk to Moriah.
What are you willing to sacrifice for God?
That is certainly a question to consider, but I believe the real question, the more painful question, the question that exposes where we need to grow is:
What are you NOT willing to sacrifice?
Where do you draw the line and say “No way. I will NOT give up Survivor / Facebook / Starbucks / Chocolate Frosted Cake Donuts.” “Lord, I’ll follow you, but don’t ask me to give up cable TV / sell my house / trade in my luxury car / take a different job.”
Genesis 22 opens by telling us that God is testing Abraham. Abraham. The man who gave up the comfort of familiar surroundings and the security of family and friends to walk out into the wilderness, to a land yet unknown to him, because God told him to (Genesis 12:1-4). Talk about a test – that was a test, and Abraham walked out in faith. Yet here we are, years later, and God is testing him again, calling him to give up something, again, but this time the sacrifice he is asking for is beyond comprehension. Sacrifice your son. Your only son, the son you love and upon whom all your hopes and dreams for the future rest. And Abraham’s response? He saddled up the donkey and headed to Moriah.
Minds and hearts more qualified than mine have mined this story for spiritual truth, but as I read this story I am struck by those lessons that I can take with me into my daily life:
God will test us – even if He has tested us before. Faith is not like one of those things where you study up, have the big test and if you pass you’re certified. As believers, we’re never DONE. There is always more to learn, more to develop, more to be done to purify us to be more and more like Jesus. I know I’m definitely not there yet, and there are undoubtedly many tests to come.
God will often ask us to relinquish the one thing we most want to hang on to. Abraham loved this child, as any of us with children can understand, but along with that was the fact that Isaac was the key to all of God’s promises to Abraham. In Timothy Keller’s book Counterfeit Gods he says:
If God had not intervened [that is, demanded the sacrifice of Isaac] Abraham would have certainly come to love his son more than anything in the world, if he did not already do so. That would have been idolatry and all idolatry is destructive.
From this perspective we see that God’s extremely rough treatment of Abraham was actually merciful. Isaac was a wonderful gift to Abraham, but he was not safe to have and hold until Abraham was willing to put God first. As long as Abraham never had to choose between his son and obedience to God, he could not see that his love was becoming idolatrous (pp. 13-14).
God is clear that we are to have “no other god’s before me.” Not our children, not our bank account, not our career or our home or computer or food or...anything.
One of the hardest prayers I’ve ever prayed is that the Lord would show me those things in my life that keep me from Him. Actually, the prayer itself was easy, but acknowledging the answer? Not so much. It isn’t the magnitude of the thing as much as my attachment to it. Some of us would rather sell our homes than give up Facebook. Is my relationship with Jesus important enough to me to pray that prayer and then act upon the answer?
When God calls, just go. Abraham didn’t mull over God’s request for a week or two. He didn’t argue with God, or beg him to reconsider. He didn't ignore God and hope that maybe He would forget about it. Abraham got up the next morning and he went. If the Almighty Creator of the universe calls you, for heaven’s sake, GO!
That isn't the end of the story, of course. I chose to split the story into two parts because I think there is value in reflecting on each piece individually. The first piece above involves simply knowing what God has called us to sacrifice. The second piece brings about the business of actually doing it, and that is a very different, and often very difficult thing.
Read: Genesis 22:9-14
When God calls us to sacrifice, he asks US to lay the thing upon the alter. God did not take Isaac from Abraham, he asked Abraham to give him up. Abraham had to build the alter, lay the wood upon it, bind his son, lay him upon the wood and then draw the knife. When God reveals something that must go (and whatever it is that chafes you to think about, that may well be it) it is our job to take the thing, bind it and lay it upon the alter.
My response to God’s call reveals both my knowledge of who He is and the depth of my love for Him. Ask a sanctuary full of church people, “Do you love God?” and hands will raise and heads will nod. Look into the schedules, the bank accounts, and the lives of those same people and the truth about those hands and heads will be revealed. I cannot love a God I do not know and I cannot know a God with whom I don’t share my life. Do I view my relationships, my decisions and my reactions to the world around me through the lens of my relationship with Christ, or is Jesus just like a sweater I put on and take off depending upon whether I'll be around my Christian friends? Is time in the Word a priority or something I just squeeze in "if I have time"? Do I approach my prayer time as simply a time to make my requests known to the Lord, or do I also come with ears to listen? "Christian" is more than a box I check under "religious affiliation." As a follower of Christ, it defines who I am, or at least it should.
You gotta look up if you want to see God's provision. At the moment that the Angel of the Lord called out to Abraham to stop him from harming his son, he looked up and saw that God had provided a ram for sacrifice. God’s intention from the start was always to provide a ram for Abraham, but the Lord had to take Abraham through the process of laying Isaac on the alter and acknowledging that as much as he loved this precious son, he loved God more. Ultimately Abraham knew that God was a holy God who would keep his promises to him and he recognized that his obedience to God’s call was more important than understanding God’s call. God always provides, but our focus must be on Him. If we are so focused on that thing we feel called to give up, we will never see God’s provision in the midst of it.
When God calls us to sacrifice something, it is never really about the thing we’re giving up, it is about an unhealthy relationship with that thing. Sometimes, like with Abraham and Isaac, our willingness to sacrifice it is enough and in the end we don't have to give it up at all. But when our attachment to something interferes with our relationship with God or our capacity to live out that which He has called us to, it needs to go, pure and simple.
Sometimes the sacrifices God calls us to are great, but sometimes the smaller ones are just as difficult to put into practice:
- the "sacrifice" of a little of my time and effort to make a meal for a friend who needs help
- the "sacrifice" of a favorite show on television in order to spend that time with the Lord instead
- the "sacrifice" of some of my favorite foods in order to be a healthier wife and mother
When I look at your heavens, the work of your fingers,
the moon and the stars, which you have set in place,
what is man that you are mindful of him,
and the son of man that you care for him Psalm 8:3-4
The Almighty God, the Creator of heaven and earth, sacrificed his Beloved Son out of love for us. This is the God that calls us. For heaven's sake, just go.
Monday, February 4, 2013
Overcoming...
It’s a new year (Since I am somewhat of a procrastinator, I don’t really get around to acknowledging this big calendar change until February), and as we do with new years, we begin new starts on all kinds of things. I’m not much one for New Year’s Resolutions. I see them as promises I make to myself that, honestly and deep down, I have little intention and less hope of keeping. I do believe in new beginnings, though, because by God’s grace, I am one in so many ways.
And in the spirit of new beginnings, I start afresh with my little blog here.
As I’ve contemplated what it is I really envision for this foray into my online pontifications. I realized that perhaps I want to expand it a bit. My relationship with Jesus is so much bigger than my relationship with food – at least it is beginning to be – and so I am going to include entries along that line as well, regardless of their relationship to chocolate donuts, potato chips or my dysfunctional relationship with them. I still face battles with my eating habits and things I need to work through, but I as I consider the things I need to overcome, I find myself in awe of the great overcomer.
I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world. John 16:33
There will always be things to overcome. Christ overcame them all, and through Him we can do the same.
And in the spirit of new beginnings, I start afresh with my little blog here.
As I’ve contemplated what it is I really envision for this foray into my online pontifications. I realized that perhaps I want to expand it a bit. My relationship with Jesus is so much bigger than my relationship with food – at least it is beginning to be – and so I am going to include entries along that line as well, regardless of their relationship to chocolate donuts, potato chips or my dysfunctional relationship with them. I still face battles with my eating habits and things I need to work through, but I as I consider the things I need to overcome, I find myself in awe of the great overcomer.
I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world. John 16:33
There will always be things to overcome. Christ overcame them all, and through Him we can do the same.
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